The story behind our philosophy

This morning I did a bit of websurfing while the caffeine injection (really, don't imagine me sipping cappuccino on the balcony overlooking the sea. It's dull and dreary and today was plain old instant Nescafé.) kicked in. 

Imagine my surprise when I came across the post 'Every blog tells a story' on Joanna Young's new blog Confident Writing. It mentioned How to Italy's philosophy and Joanna had cited our opening paragraph:

"We’re not cats.  We don’t have nine lives.  Just the one. 
And we believe we should make the most of it."

It made me realise that I've never explained what's behind this statement. So here it is:

Mario was just 32 when he was diagnosed with a rare form of mouth, nose and throat cancer. He hardly ever drank and has never smoked so the diagnosis was even more strange. Officially he was given a 40pc chance of survival. Unofficially, of course, that chance of survival was much, much lower - as the oncologists confirmed afterwards.

But he's a fighter. The tumour couldn't be removed so it had to be destroyed with chemo and radiotherapy. The gruelling treatment left him temporarily paralysed and unable to talk. But that didn't stop his company IT Holding offering him a management position in Germany. Mario rose to the challenge and moved to Dusseldorf by himself. As well as getting himeself back to optimum health, coping with the move, settling into his new life in Germany and managing his new team, he also learnt German even though he couldn't speak.

Mario used to be very sporty. He used to play basketball and would referee around Italy. He also played tennis in the scorching heat of the Sardinian sun. But the radiotherapy had destroyed one of his vocal chords and he was very thin and weak. Nevertheless, he concentrated on riding his bike to work and going for short runs in the park to get back his fitness.

That was all before I met Mario. When I found out, I was in shock. But also in awe. Just moving to Italy was daunting enough to me. And there he was dealing with the prospect of death, recovering from cancer, moving to Germany by himself, managing a foreign team of staff and learning another foreign language.

I didn't know Mario when he was diagnosed nor in the two years afterwards. I only know from what he and his friends have told me. But I've been there for the follow-up exams and medical check ups every four months knowing that the cancer could come back at any stage. Mario wasn't cured. He was still at risk. We didn't know what the future held. So we didn't talk about it. We just concentrated on everylife. Sitting on the beach at midnight and gazing up at the stars. Enjoying a weekend breakfast in a bar. Or watching the robins and the blackbirds build their nests in the garden.

Last September, six-and-a-bit years after the original diagnosis, Mario was officially given the all clear. What's more, oncologists at the European Oncology Institute in Milan say he is one of the best recoveries they have ever seen. Mario doesn't blow his own trumpet. He doesn't think what he has achieved is any big deal which is why I'm going to blow it for him. I'm incredibly, incredibly proud of him  - as are all his friends. I'm less proud of the fact that these days he can outride me on the bike, beat me hands down at tennis and run way faster than me.

Mario has taught me a lot about values and giving it your all no matter what the circumstances. He's the life and soul of the party. His infectious enthusiasm for anything and everything rubs off you. And he can motivate anyone into action.

Both of us have goals. And both of us achieve them. But at the same time both of us live in the here and now. Neither of us want to die regretting not having the time or courage to realise our dreams.

Comments

[Joanna Young]

It's a stunning and inspiring story Emma. Thank you (both) for sharing it.

Joanna

[Hilda]

Hi Emma,

That is an inspiring story and completely resonates with my own life philosophy. Living in the here and now is essential to our happiness, especially as we never know how long we're here for.

And thanks for the shout out on your Common traits.. post :-)

All the best,

Hilda

[Emma Bird]

Hi Joanna, Hi Hilda

Pleased you found Mario's story inspiring. And, yes, living in the here and now is definitely important. That's why I've just been working in a coastal cafe today. The three hours of brainstorming whizzed by in a second.

Emma

[Martin]

A powerful reminder that we are all in charge of our lives, no matter what comes our way. And that there is always someone somewhere with an even bigger mountain to climb than the one we face ourselves.

A wonderfully uplifting story, Emma. Thanks for blogging it.